Mostly Buffy

I-o Spy-o

On our daily walks to and from school, Buffy and I chat, sing loud songs (thank you, HSM), and play I-spy. Buffy's version is the best, "I-o, Spy-o with my little eye-o..."

It's so good, that the rest of us have adopted it. It's hard to remember any other way. It's also good to have reminders that she can be adorable. Right now she's screeching until she starts coughing. Nah, that's not annoying at all. That doesn't make me want to take ice picks to my ear drums so I never have to experience the shrill again. Not one tiny bit.

Oh Trespass Sweetly Urged!

Buffy: Kiss me, Mommie!


Buffy: Oh! You have my lips! And I have your lips!

Mommie: Oh no! Give me my lips back!


Buffy: I still have your li-ips!


I could do this all day long.


A few years back, when we had only one basket of toys, I decided it was a good thing to have only a few toys. We didn't skimp on play, but we were forced to use our imaginations more. Happy parenting only needed a good dose of imagination. And books. Imagination and books. Thus decided, I espoused the merits of books to a friend. I think I said something along the lines of it didn't matter if we didn't have many toys, as long as we had lots of books. We could always invent games, and books were priceless. She agreed, but suggested an amendment: puzzles. Most everything could be accomplished with imagination, books and puzzles. Before this goes on to a Monty Python sketch, I'll get to the point. Buffy loves puzzles.

Actually, Buffy more than loves puzzles. In puzzles we have found the one thing that keeps Buffy's attention. She can puzzle for hours. Literally hours. The thing is, she's pretty good at puzzles. Possibly too good for some big sisters in the area...

Other mothers with two girls have said their second daughter is noticeably better at puzzles than the elder was. I wonder why that is. All I know is Buffy can now do every puzzle in the house completely unaided. I need a library for puzzles now!

And, Kate, if I didn't say so before, you were right.


I woke up this morning to the heavy thudding of tiny feet, pattering all over the house.


Door opens



Door opens



Door bangs open


I thought, "Oh shit," and dashed out of bed to re-explain to Buffy that Gramma is in Barcelona for a few days. She took it much better than Katie did when Gramma left yesterday. We all can't wait for Sunday!

The Gloves Are Off

It's been nearly two weeks since our bedtime routine changed. We used to do teeth, bath, jammies, nummies (breastfeeding), stories then bed. Each of these steps had its own routine. For Buffy each step involved a dance of "No let me do it" and "I can't do it! You do it!". This is a tricky dance to navigate and despite a year of practice, we still don't have the steps right. While it might seem difficult for Nummies to be a "No, I do it!" sort of event, there are elements Buffy likes to do on her own.

First I have to sit comfortably cross-legged on Buffy's bed. She then lays across my knees and immediately complains about her "tail". She sleeps in a Gro-Bag and refers to the bottom as the tail. Fine, so we fix the tail and then I get myself ready. This is a tough job because Buffy is already hitting me and moaning to put on her "gloves". This means sliding the top hand under my shirt and the bottom hand inside my sleeve. The meet in the middle somewhere around my shoulder. She would like them to meet around my armpit, but this does not for happy nursing make. When she's done nursing, she pops off, gives me a huge smile and yanks out her hands, "Gloves off!" This is usually followed a few minutes later by a gleeful, "I took my gloves off!"

Well, now I'm sorry to say the gloves are off for good. It has been almost two weeks since I last nursed Buffy. She asked for the first time last night, but was so easily distracted that I didn't worry. She's been down to one Nummies a day for months now. She nursed so beautifully and easily that I would have let it go even longer. Just a short moment out of every day to cuddle her so perfectly, give her something I know is good for us both, and offer her some warmth for her hands.

Apart from actually bringing them into the world, breastfeeding has been the best thing I've ever done for my children. I love it so much. It was so hard with Katie, so many bouts of mastitis. So much difficulty. Nursing Buffy has been almost perfect, with only one case of possible mastitis that went away faster than I could call a lactation consultant. For both girls, it was the absolute best thing. It staved off illness, kept us close, soothed injuries, fended off extra poundage, fed, nourished, and will decrease my chances of breast and ovarian cancer.

This is where I have to get on my soapbox for a minute. We could argue that breastfeeding does all these amazing things for us. We pro-breastfeeders say it's liquid gold. It's magic medicine. But it's not. Really, it's normal. What it means is the alternatives are worse for us. Breastfeeding doesn't decrease our risk of cancer, it's not breastfeeding that increases our risks. Formula increases risks of allergies and asthma.

Describing not-breastfeeding in a negative light is highly controversial and makes people very defensive. I see it as being scientifically objective. It's like saying dehydration harms bodily functions. Not breastfeeding has negative side effects. What it comes down to for me is informed choice. Choosing not to breastfeed means giving something up. For some women this choice makes sense. If they have made that choice consciously, I don't think they should feel bad. They made the right choice for them. My objection is to societal expectations that bottles are for babies and breasts are for men.

I just want to sing the praises of one of the most wonderful parts of motherhood. It's wonderous and magical and 100% what our bodies were meant to do. I also know that the women who visit our site have breastfed their gorgeous babies. You are all awesome and wonderful, and you know what I'm talking about. You also know what a rollercoaster of emotion this is for me right now. I'm so happy to have nursed Buffy for two years, seven months and two weeks. I'm so glad she had that foundation. And I'm so happy to be done.

La Leche League
Lactation Consultants of Great Britain
Breastfeeding Board at iVillage

What Can You Do in Five Minutes?

In five minutes I can sit down to the computer with a glass of water and open my email. In the very same five minutes Buffy can sneak upstairs, change out of her clothes into Katie's jammies, take out her ponytail, bring Katie's pillow and duvet downstairs and crawl underneath to pretend to sleep. Maybe if I'd given her seven minutes she'd be asleep by now.

Syndicate content